I’ve mentioned my extraordinary son Matthew previously… like my three other fine sons and two lovely daughters he has been blessed with the gift of great intelligence and remarkable wit. At 14 Matthew is my youngest and his brain the most unique because he is autistic and sees things far differently than anyone I’ve ever known.

Autism is a neurological jigsaw puzzle that science and medicine has yet to complete. In simplistic terms autistic brains are not hard-wired normally and don’t process information in the customary manner. The result can range from heartbreaking to amazing. For an example of the latter and the most astonishing example of the power of the mind I have ever seen I urge you to meet Stephen Wiltshire, The Human Camera at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8YXZTlwTAU

Autistic children are rarely funny and if so it is almost always accidentally rather than by design. Not so with my boy. He is profoundly funny and knows it. He so brilliantly just analyzed my flawed character that I’m now as utterly convinced he’s a genius as he is that I’m a total winner at being a loser.

His mother and I parted company more than five years ago and I haven’t lived with a woman since. With that in mind consider this very recent horrifying scenario….yours truly emerging from my bathroom with uncombed hair a tangled mess in tandem with a day or two without showering and five days without shaving. I’m proudly sporting a T-shirt with multiple holes accented by a dazzling array of condiment stains topping a pair of ripped boxer shorts featuring a jaunty chili pepper motif.

Matthew looks up up from a video game he’s playing, sizes me up and says “God, you need a woman.”

After I stop laughing I ask, “Do you think I could get one?”

“Maybe. She’d have to be unbelievably lonely. Of course, after she married you she’d still be lonely.”

“Do you think I should marry a pretty wife?”

“I think you should marry a stupid, lazy wife who will spend all day with you looking at EBay and Craigslist.”

“What do you think I need to do to attract a woman?”

“First put on some pants and be a man. Then you’ll have to change everything about yourself.”

“Really? Everything?”

“Yes, everything. If you don’t believe me ask your mirror.”

“Ouch. OK, what do I have to change?”

“Well, you’re almost dead and your looks are gone, so you’ll have to concentrate on your personality. You need to develop the qualities you’re missing – loyalty, honesty, compassion, a sense of fairness and, most importantly, citizenship.”

“You’re a brilliant boy, Matthew.”

“I’m just a kid from Brooklyn,” he replies.

So that’s how I started the new year – being ripped to shreds by my autistic son who obviously has more clarity than I’ll ever have. Happy 2013 to me.

For those of you who’d also like to gaze disapprovingly at me I will be exhibiting my wooly wares at the glorious High Noon show in Mesa, Arizona on January 26th and 27th. It’s the best cowboy and Indian exhibition in all the land and I’ll have a dandy selection there, but the bulk of my very deep inventory can be seen in my home. Anyone who wishes to visit Indian blanket Mecca and possibly be verbally dissected by my son please e-mail me at blanketboy@cox.net and/or call me at 602-595-1157.

Let’s now all gather ‘round for our first featured blanket of the year. From the Valerie De Lapp collection comes this 1920’s Oregon City Woolen Mills Dragonfly variant pattern in excellent colors. I have a special affection for Oregon City. Their retail store in Tacoma, Washington was a precious stone’s throw from my family’s jewelry store. As the sign in the picture says, we offered credit, but just for fun we made people beg for it.